Gobbledegook.

Sigh.

I have so much to say that I don't really know where to start. My mind/daily life lately seems to be lots of little blurs of activity. Work is really good - I have three more weeks 'til St. Louis and then the wedding and then the big fancy national music therapy conference where I just found out I'll be presenting to as many as 100 people (depending on if people want to get up early to check out my presentation but seeing as I apparently beat out a bunch of other multicultural MT presentations, I predict that all THOSE GUYS will be at it. At least, I hope so.) (was that too long for a parenthetical statement?)

Kyle keeps asking what I want to do while we're in StL and my thought is that we'll get there, party for the wedding, have a blast in the aftermath with family and friends and then I'll spend 6 solid days freaking out. THEN I can concentrate on things like Thanksgiving and...NOT graduating in December.

Oh yeah, that's a long story. The short of it is that working where I work is um, stressful. I really feel like I've thrown myself wholeheartedly into it and if I've procrastinated on my thesis, it's only because I've been doing things like hanging out with friends, which is a VERY GOOD THING for my sanity. Especially considering where I work. Besides, I can start studying for my orals NOW and get that over with in a timely manner as well as defend my paper (if that LADY will EVER give me my DATA) (or heck, even show up on time I mean, AT ALL, for the appointments we set) and plan a really good graduation/housewarming party. Maybe by then we'll have a new bathroom. K's really ready to be done with the summer camp bathroom we're currently tolerating.

At any rate, my advisor laughed out loud when I told her that I no longer have any pride - just do whatever it takes for me to get this dang paper written, rewritten, defended, whatever. I just want to get it done. When you start out writing a thesis you think it's your THING and then you realize along the way that it's just another flaming hoop (albeit a very small tricksy hoop that keeps changing on you) that you have to jump through. I've even second-guessed my brilliant scheme to write a thesis thinking to myself, "Is it too late to turn this into a professional paper?" (yes) and a good friend recently put it best when she said that she's leaning toward a ppaper because writing a thesis is more for if later you want to get your Ph.D. in which case you'd have to write an equivalent somewhere along the way and who's to say first off that she even WANTS to get her Ph.D. and second, if that happens it'll be pretty far down the line and how can she make a decision now on something she may not want down the line? As for me, I know that I want to be a professor, know that I want to get my Ph.D., know that it's going to be loads of work especially if I want to start up the ol' baby maker in the next 5 years.

Wow - getting that all out of my head was really therapeutic.

Speaking of therapeutic, the Jason Mraz show in Dallas was AMAAAAAAAZING and not just because our sweet tickets were 13th row. When I get the rest of my brain cells together, I'll write about it because it was probably one of the better shows I've been to.

Also, leaving this place is going to be really hard for me in a couple weeks - I've come to really love and enjoy my coworkers and it's going to be tough to leave them.

No promises that I'll write any time soon because I have to make boxes and peel grapes for the Fall Carnival on Wednesday and then it's back to Dallas on Friday!