33 weeks

I wouldn't mind if the baby showed up a little bit early. Somewhere in the 37-38 week zone would be gravy. 

That's 4 weeks from now.

Jeepers.

week 32 update

I've started going to the midwife every 2 weeks (!!!) and everything looks great - she could feel the baby is in a good position (if you're me, head is down, back is to the left, pointing to the right) which explains why I feel way more movement on the right side. Numbers-wise, I've gained 28 pounds total so far, and she did a blood test last visit and my glucose levels are good, and she said that I'm not anemic but am on the low side of normal for iron (which would partly explain why I've been so exhausted lately) so she suggested adding spirulina, chlorophyll (you can find these two things in the Odwalla or Naked Super Food drinks), more dark leafy greens, beans, and of course red meat...I'm thinking cheeseburgers and mashed sweet potatoes with kale for dinner sounds about right :) The best part about seeing a midwife is that we spent an hour talking about health, diet, exercise, labor preparation, and whatever else I could think of. I asked her about how many weeks past a woman's due date she's comfortable with before doing any sort of "induction" (evening primrose oil, stripping membranes, castor oil, etc) and she said that she'll go 42 weeks and then call her backup OB for his input. Mostly she just said that babies show up when they're ready and if someone got the dates wrong or it's just not time yet the best thing to do is be patient. In life in general, if the baby's like Kyle it'll be early and if it's like me, it'll be late. Maybe we'll compromise on somewhere in the middle ;)

My doula came over to our house last Sunday to chat with Kyle and I about what a typical birth progression looks like, what we can expect, and what her role will be - which is supporting the two of us, explaining what is normal, helping Kyle support me in the best way possible, and most importantly being there at our house early in the labor process before we go to the birth center. We also discussed worst case scenario options, which hopefully we won't have to worry about but if for any reason we have to transfer to a hospital with my midwife's backup OB/GYN, she'll be yet another advocate for whatever-is-good-for-the-baby-with-least-amount-of-interventions.  

Aaaand the bathroom remodel started this week, as if we didn't have a million other things going on. Coming home every day to see the progress is really cool - and makes me really REALLY grateful we've decided to get contractors and not try to DIY this sucker.

more on the name debate...

overheard in the sleepy morning hours: 

K: "I found another name I like."

C: "Like, for real this time?"
K: "Yes. Emmett."

C: "As in, Smith?"
K: "Noooo...as in Brown! Doc from Back to the Future?"

"Apparently it's also a Twilight character..."

*****

In other news, life and work are good...I'm getting better every day at the balancing act. Today I'm supposed to be going to a conference called Understanding the Needs of the Dying. I'm all registered up and can't seem to get motivated. I think it's because there haven't been many days lately where I get to choose to sit and just be. Let the crafting, yoga, swimming, decorating, organizing, cleaning obligations wait while I idle a day away with my thoughts and maybe a journal or a musical instrument. We got to do a little of this life-enjoying with some friends in Tulsa a few weekends ago and it was glorious. No need to rush to be anywhere, just chat, swim, walk, nap, enjoy each other's company.

I picked up my journal from over a year ago and wow am I a busy individual. I was at once starting a new job, finishing my thesis, and training for a triathlon. The thought right there makes me want to hide under the covers for a week. I am learning to slow down and enjoy more. At first it wasn't a lesson I welcomed but now I bask in the gloriousness of it.

Of course, I still have obligations to fulfill but I'm learning that it's okay to be a little selfish, to say no. My professional life requires me to give all day every day. Me time is not a luxury but a necessity.

30 Weeks?!

On Friday I had an appointment with my midwife which was kind of like a party because my doula was there. It was the first time she and my midwife had officially met and they had such a wonderful instant rapport that it put me at ease, made me confident in the choices K and I have made concerning prenatal care. There was such a strong energy of love, respect, and strength in that exam room that was almost tangible, and I left my appointment grinning. I've now gotten to the point where I'll be checking in with my midwife every 2 weeks! Seriously I'm having a hard time wrapping my brain around how we got here.

In terms of the books I've been reading (besides Mockingjay duh) I've moved on to Ina May Gaskin's Guide to Breast Feeding, which I've learned a lot from. Part of the reason we chose the less-medicalized birth route is how important I believe breastfeeding to be and the desire to stay away from interventions that have been shown to hinder the process (induction, C-Section, whisking the baby away immediately after birth, etc.). This is another topic that people are really passionate about and that women have a ton of baggage associated with it - whether or not they felt supported or successful as breastfeeding mothers is HUGE, and people are NOT afraid to share. I grew up in a family where yes modesty is valued but of greater importance is being comfortable with your body. Plus, my mom is one of those militant Breast is Best freedom fighters, and was adamant about breastfeeding all of her children...the first two of which were born when it wasn't all that popular in her family (except, she was in California and a hippie, so she did it anyway).

The other book I'm really excited about is a book called Mother Rising that talks about American culture's lack of ceremony regarding rites of passage...lack isn't the right word exactly, but...I guess the superficiality of them. I got to thinking about my rites of passage...I didn't have a quincinera, although my grandmother was a HUGE proponent. I was a debutante though, and as much as I get made fun of for it, the benefits of that program and the friendships I've gained have been far-reaching. Even last month I had to call upon the gracious girly skills to participate in a luncheon with the individuals who fund several music projects where I work, including the music therapy program. I definitely see that time in my life as a turning point toward adulthood. 

Then in college there are various rites of trial and passage - auditions to various ensembles, inductions into sororities, graduation, etc. The one I have a special place in my heart for is my pledge class's induction into SAI. It was a little different than it had been done before, but the words, quotes, and songs from that ceremony have stuck with me since 2001 because they so eloquently express how I feel about love and music.

Sorry, tangent. Basically how this relates to becoming a mom is that baby showers sort of are like rites of passage, but generally speaking there is not a ritual in American culture where a mother to be sits around with the women who she has been strengthened by her whole life for a time to gain wisdom about the passage into motherhood and a time for the momma to be to be strengthened and pampered. Different people call these different things - sometimes a blessingway or a mother blessing. All I know is it's going to involve strong women, good bonding time, good music, and uplifting words, and hopefully it's something that my girlfriends and I keep going as we each become mommas.

In baby room news, well...mostly I guess I should label this a house update because there's a bunch of crazy stuff going down in the casa. First off, since we don't have enough going on in life right now we've decided to renovate the oompa loompa master bathroom. Not expand it, just work with the existing framework and upgrade/streamline it a bit. The final plans are in, and a guy is coming out Wednesday to take measurements for the cabinets. What that means is that we've gotta move out of our bathroom/bedroom in the next week.  

That in turn translates to the mother of all purges and rearranges this house has ever seen. 

This morning saw the cleaning out and re-purposing of the front hall closet. I'm still dreaming of the day when Kyle will have his own beer brewing station out in the garage, but for now I can deal with the plethora of empty beer bottles. He even found some unopened brew from couple years ago and yelled "Jackpot!" They're in the fridge - I'll let you know how they turn out.

The verbosity of this post is entirely because I'm taking a break from moving all my stuff out of my closet/side of the dresser into the baby room closet, packing up and sorting through the clothes that no longer fit me or are no longer my style (total bags/boxes to Goodwill or Half Price Books today alone: 7) It feels ridiculous good to be doing this, the clearing out of the old to make way for the new. Phew. Okay. Back to work!

UPDATE: The beer is delicious. I know you were all on the edge of your seats.

ahhhhh...sleep!

I'm sleeping better, thank goodness, and I'm also at 28 weeks, which I think officially puts me in my 3rd trimester. Crazy town. I'm getting really excited - I want to know what the kid looks like, if it's a boy or a girl, and am really REALLY ready to not have to answer the "do you have any weird cravings?" question for a really, really long time.

Back to the sleep issue, I don't know if I wrote about this already but I got a Snoogle from my friend Kyna that has quite literally saved my sanity. That, and I got some earplugs 'cos a) Kyle snores like a freight train and b) increased momma hormones = waking up to EVERY. LITTLE. SOUND. so instead of smothering my darling husband every night with a pillow, I've been snoozing like a rock star. Also, I've become one with the excuse to get in bed at 8:30. That has meant cutting down on some extracurricular activities during the week, but the payoff has been so worth it.

We've started working on the kid's room - we've got a crib, rocking chair, even some paint tests on the walls! I'm converting a couple pieces of furniture that we already have to function as baby furniture so we don't have to buy new stuff. 

 We refinished an old armoire of Kyle's parent's like...5 or 6 years ago...and turned it into a TV cabinet. Well, we got a new TV so now the cabinet is going to be fitted with a closet bar and made into a baby closet. The colors we'd painted it so many years ago even fit with the decor.  I was delighted when I opened my Martha Stewart Homekeeping Handbook and there's a little section on how to convert an armoire into a baby storage closet. Further proof that me and Martha are soulmates.

My second project is turning our dresser into a changing table. The plan is to sand/paint the top of it, add some stencils to the drawers, and exchange the hardware. There's a ton of storage in this piece of furniture and I'm excited to get going on this. I'll get pics up soon, I promise.

grrrrr

I have been a super cranky pants lately, and considering I passed out at 7pm last night, I'm going to go ahead and admit that I just flat need more sleep. I want to be more giddy about this whole life-creating thing going on, but right now it seems to take waaaay more effort than I can spare. Ugh, I sould like Eeyore! This weekend we're going to Austin...perhaps I can score an end-of-summer sno cone to make it all better :)

honey got some boobies like wow, oh wow

yeah, I said it. If you don't want to read about boobs, just go ahead and skip this.

I've never been particularly, ahem, gifted in this area, which is why the day that I went to VS and the bra-fitter lady told me I was a D, I clapped and giggled for a solid 24 hours. The most amazing thing that's happened though was last night I was reading about breastfeeding and it said that around 23-24 weeks some women can manually express collostrum. Of course I tried it this morning and it WORKED. No water works or anything, but definitely a neat little trick I couldn't do a few weeks ago.

Guys. I can freaking create and sustain life. I am a freaking superhero.

et voila

I am honestly dumbfounded by how little money, time, and brain power to make my very own "Hooter Hider." Thanks again to CityCraft for the fabulous *BOLD! BEAUTIFUL! GENDER NEUTRAL!*  fabric (ONLY A YARD PEOPLE) and the Mama Monster, where I got the pattern.

also made this week: an oilcloth bag. I took a class over at CityCraft and learned soooo much (including that i need to get my machine serviced...oops) and had a wonderful time with a cozy gathering of women. I had never taken a sewing class before and was really nervous but had a blast and will definitely be going back.

Guess what everyone's getting for Christmas!

In other kinds of crafting news, my herb garden is basically just tending to itself...I've got loads of Basil, thyme, oregano, chamomile, and my bright lights chard just keeps on giving! It's really amazing. I wanted a wild herb garden, and that is certainly what I'm getting. I don't even stress about the caterpillars that have moved in on my parsley remnants.

The thing that has made me smile the most this summer is that an heirloom tomato from last year has decided to plant it's pretty self in the not-so-sunniest spot in the garden. AND THEN decided that op, nope, about a foot away would be MUCH better thank you, and...well, we've got 3 baby tomatoes going and are just going to see what happens:

I am amazed at nature.

not worthy. also, living mindfully.

oh, the saving grace of the beautiful women I have the pleasure of calling besties. Tonight Kyle's guy friends came over about 6ish and kidnapped him for a pre-fatherhood "bachelor"-type party. Without telling him where they were going, they hauled him off to the Choctaw Casino up in Oklahoma. When I found out about the idea, I cried. I can't wait to get the full report tomorrow morning :)

So while the guys were out, the girls decided to have our own fun which involved tiaras, GayBingo, and an evening in the Bishop Arts District. I was expecting to go out and having a wonderful time, I was not expecting to be showered with all kinds of love and wonderfulness. I have some kick-ass girlfriends, and am blessed to share life with them.

Which brings me to my next random thought (it's WAY past my bedtime, so I'm delirious, so bear with me) about being present in our own lives. It's been a struggle the last few weeks to actually connect with...anyone. There's all this stuff I want to do and people I want to hang out with but honestly...and I never EVER thought I would EVER be this person...all I want to do when I get home is lay on the couch and let my brain melt into butter while watching television. It is the most counterproductive thing on the planet...I KNOW that the key to my happiness means doing something with my hands and not being inert, but I just want to lay there and not think. In fact, it's been WEEKS since we've seen some of our friends who live TWO MILES AWAY. I've heretofore declared things like this unacceptable.

We as a couple have gotten sucked into this vortex of being exhausted when we get home, and are still trying to balance how to work this two person full-time worker thing and then once you start thinking about not only having a kid but HEY we haven't walked the dog in like a month and a half what the heck and then there are friends and family we haven't seen in ages and how are we supposed to give all we can at work and still have time for our little family when we get home and then connect with everyone? As far as I can tell it means taking a few minutes out of my day to just breathe, relax, and know that it's okay to not give out every last drop at work, to save some for myself. I get the feeling that sanity in parenting is similar...having to fight for what you love and believe in but also know that you need to stay true to yourself and refill that well. It all comes back to self care, doesn't it.

I mean, I'm inclined to think that television is the root of all evil anyway, but any suggestions anyone out there has would be a fascinating read.

crafting mama

Working with my hands, be it writing, crocheting, painting, sewing, gardening, cooking, making music, is the key to my happiness and sanity. I am blessed to come from a long line of hippies and homemakers and married into a family that truly cherishes and rocks out all things handmade. I am currently inspired by a place in Dallas called CityCraft, a place to find beautiful fabrics (Amy Butler in the flesh omg!) and resources. I go probably every other week...because it coincides with payday...and because I love nothing more than letting my brain unwind in front of their endless array of color and pattern choices.

When my neice was born 8 years ago my sister had a tough time finding big 40" swaddle blankets and employed me to make a bunch for her friends after her mother in law made her a bunch. When I started looking around for registry items I realized that I didn't like a single pattern anywhere, and decided to make my own. Feast your eyes:

I am obsessed with Michael Miller and Amy Butler fabrics. I originally was going to make 8 swaddle blankets but have decided to make one more and then move on to more projects. I've gotten a whole lot more confident with my sewing machine, can navigate its tempermental tension settings, and actually figured out how to make square blankets.

I have a zillion ideas swirling around in my head...I just found a hooter hider pattern that I cannot WAIT to try out, maybe next week, and have decided I want to make a whole bunch of new placemats, runners, and napkins, seeing as our table is GORGEOUS and is in need of some new bling.

HelLO, nesting monster.

the frequently asked questions

I saw this video about a year ago and still every time I watch it I laugh my butt off. I've worked very hard to not be "that pregnant girl" with all the smugness and self-righteousness. Hopefully it's working.

What I've found insane while being pregnant is the crazy, wildly intimate things people will tell you now that you're in the Mommy Club. People and their unsolicited advice and/or miscarriage stories are uh..sometimes hard to listen to, but I've gotten good at just smiling and saying "uh huh..." I feel blessed that there is a certain intimacy surrounding childbirth and I'm honored to be someone with whom people feel like sharing their fears and difficult times. What's been cool is that I now know the juicy details about just about everyone in my family and how they were born. I love those stories, and admire the mothers even more, knowing that they faced their hardest challenge and triumphed beautifully.
I've come to the conclusion that everyone has their own personal idea of how things should be done and that is the Right Way, which is fine for them, and I can make my own decisions. I have the feeling it's going to be like this just bringing a child into the world. For now, my way happens to include chocolate, chai lattes, eggs over easy, dr. pepper, turkey sandwiches and the occassional half glass of wine. So, you know. Judge away ;)

I've been getting a lot of the same questions lately, so thought I'd answer them on here.

Can you feel the baby moving?
uhh...all the time. It's quite distracting, and I know it's only going to get moreso and wow am I looking forward to it :) Yesterday I was in the elevator and felt my baby do this crazy somersault and my first reaction was "GROSS!" Y'all, it's really sci-fi stuff up in here and I try really hard not to think of this:

You're using a midwife? Are you doing a waterbirth?
Well? The two things aren't mutually inclusive, and honestly the thought of bobbing in my own goo really oogs me out, but the birth center is equipped with a totally kick-ass jacuzzi tub that I plan on using to ease the pains and tensions of labor. If the baby happens to decide it wants to be born when I'm in the tub, then cool, but I'm not married to any specific plan.

You're not finding out the gender?!
Oh, we know, but we're not telling.

Kidding.

Nope. Don't worry, it came as a complete surprise to me too. Some friends did the same thing and I thought it was the dumbest thing ever. How are you going to plan? What clothes is the baby going to wear? I am so that girl who used to sneak under the Christmas tree and unwrap presents and then re-wrap them. I'm a spoiler of surprises of epic proportions. But...the more I thought about it, and the fact that our house has the one extra room for baby space, I realized that there was no way I'd ever want to trick out a room all in all boy or girl stuff and then repaint it later. So, laziness is my number 1 answer. Also, I'm not a huge fan of pastel colors, and neither blue or pink are in my scheme of favorites. I've actually had a fantastic time thinking about all the ways I'm going to combine greys, browns, black, greens, dark purples, oranges, and reds.

I had a sonogram last week and WOW is all I can say - I wasn't expecting to get all up close and personal with my kid's neural ventricals and heart chambers. It was absolutely awe-inspiring. We weren't even tempted to find out the gender, and the awesome tech didn't even push us.

Do you have any weird cravings?
At the beginning I couldn't eat anything, so I would just head into the cafeteria at work and think about stuff until I settled on something that sounded good. I ate french fries and mustard about three days straight. It wasn't my proudest moment. I have never EVER been a fan of cereal but right now I'm luxuriating in a bowl of quaker oat squares. I don't necessarily get a lot of weird cravings, but I try to practice mindful eating which sometimes means standing in the store with a blank look on my face while I think of every possible combination. What's great about being prego is that when I finally do come to the conclusion of what I want to eat, be it cous cous and buffalo or chicken and waffles or a turkey sandwhich it is the BEST FLIPPING THING I HAVE EVER EATEN! It's kind of awesome.

So, I heard you were really sick and puking all the time?
This is my least favorite question not because I hate reliving the experience but because people tend to ask it right in the middle of a meal. I'm actually still puking every once in awhile. I barf in the mornings probably like 2 out of 7 days a week, and then yesterday I was queasy all day, then came home, crawled in bed and napped, then hurled everything I'd eaten all day. I then slept 13 hours and woke up feeling really weak but now feel really good. So yeah. I'll talk about it, but don't ask me about it when I'm trying to enjoy my breakfast.

good morning, insomnia, how are you?

There is an alien resident in my body and it makes me do all kinds of weird things. Like pee 500 times a day. Like, wake up at all hours of the night to pee. Like, go to bed at 8pm and then wake up refreshed, bright eyed and bushy tailed. At 1am. I'm learning to roll with the punches but dang. Pregnancy's bag of tricks sure is wide and varied. I still need to take a belly shot or two, I realize this. I was doing my music therapy rounds of my floors, checking in with folks when the inevitable "YOU'RE PREGNANT OMG!?" conversation came up and a nurse, a healthcare professional, guessed after looking at me that I was 10 weeks prego. Actually, before that she guessed that I was totally yanking her chain and I most certainly was not. It was kinda surreal.

The other thing that has me puzzled is that I am generally speaking a very. VERY. Emotional individual. Like, cries at dog food and SPCA commercials. A lot of people wonder how I do what I do at the hospital and I just...the smiles, the families, the sheer musical genius of the kids I work with all outweighs all the leeches crazy, heavy stuff that we deal with on a daily basis. However, I've not been the standard weepy mess I usually am. I didn't even cry at the season finale of Glee.

I know. Blame the foetus.

Thing is, I need to cry every once in awhile, and I last week I could feel an Edward-Scissorhands-type boo-hoo building up inside, not over anything and about everything at the same time. The hubs and I had both been insanely busy and involved at work, meaning we didn't have a whole lot of time to just sit and rap between episodes of The Good Guys and The Bachelorette, and there's a LOT of stuff we have to get figured out in the next four months, one of which being re-doing our bedroom/bathroom/study area. He asked about how long into the pregnancy I'd be able to handle moving everything out of the back of the house and living in the guest room for a couple months and when I started picturing the process of it I burst into tears right there. I wish I'd had a camera to capture the look on his face because...well the next words out of his mouth were something like, "Hey...uh...crazy? Can we discuss tile choices?" It's just that I had just figured out how to be prego and do this glorious work that I love and the thought of turning another part of my life upside down just...well, it made me Ugly Cry over white subway tiles with green accents.

Never a dull moment, folks, this Life with a Fetus.

hey baby hey baby hey

Kyle felt the nugget move for the first time today :) The end.

total preg-out moment, round dos.

Maybe I'm just weird, maybe it's because I've got a lot going on, but I used to get a little frustrated when people are all "OMG ARE YOU SO EXCITED TO BE PREGNANT?!" I felt guilty for so long because my honest answer was a big fat NO. Mostly because I felt gross at the time, had no clue what I was doing, and was scared out of my wits. I also had all these things I wanted to do before I got pregnant. 

The biggest one being this: I assumed that I would have a job for a while and then quit it because I didn't want to put my kids in daycare and have someone else raise my children. Well, we all know how that worked out. I honestly never thought I'd get the job of my dreams at 27. I thought it was going to happen in like, 10 years. I'm still reconciling the thought of childcare (which is why I'm just now starting to look into it) and being okay with not feeling bad about how hard I've worked and the blessings that have been tossed my way that got me where I am. 

I've had complete crying freak-outs over the silliest things...like the time it was too hot out and I couldn't go to a concert with my friends because I nearly got heat stroke from walking around the block that morning. I literally sobbed on the couch in Kyle's arms and wailed, "I just want my life back! I want to know how to feel better!" Or my personal favorite "What am I supposed to do when the baby cries? What if it's hungry AND poopy? Do we change the diaper first then feed it or the other way around?" (note: I have since had it on good authority that nobody, no matter what age they are, likes to eat while sitting in their own stuff.)

And then I think, "what is WRONG WITH ME?" I know of several people who are probably reading this and wanting to punch me in the face because they want to be pregnant, or have a hard time getting there and think that this all sounds really selfish and ungrateful of me. For that I apologize. I really do think that my hormones are a little off and my serotonin (ie: my happy brain juice) is whacked out.

I do have to say though, that I get excited in bursts. There was the time when I was dyeing the onesies for my friend, and then I did some music therapy with a teeny tiny baby that involved singing and rocking and infant massage and my brain flashed forward to 5 months from now and I got all verklempt. 

Hands down the most embarrassing thing that's happened is after work last week Kesha's "Your Love Is My Drug" came on the radio and y'all. I was IN. TEARS.

Here are some pertinent snippets:

My friends think I've gone crazy

My judgement's gone a little hazy

I don't care what people say

The rush is worth the price I pay

What you've got is hard to find

I think about (you) all the time

I'm all strung out my heart is fried

I just can't get you off my mind

(I think you know the chorus)

Jeez - I'm getting weepy just thinking about it. Am I lame or WHAT?

Rumblings

So in baby news, we're 18 weeks along, or 4.5 months. This weekend we celebrated our anniversary by traipsing off to the North Texas hill country beauty that is Possum Kingdom and did a lot of swimming, reading, and sleeping. A lot. We were both in dire need of some mindless lake-staring :)

People have been asking if I can feel the baby move yet, and I've replied that it feels every once in a while like there's a goldfish flopping around in my uterus. This weekend though, as I laid to read on my stomach in the sand, and then again this morning while I was trying to go BACK to sleep at 6:30am, I was absolutely, utterly distracted and AWED by the rhumba being performed in my abdomen. I try to wrap my brain around the design of growing a baby inside a person and get lost in the intricacies and the wonder. It's pretty insane - both in theory and in practice. It's also a little sci-fi, so of course I like it. I'm excited for the day that K can actually feel the kiddo move around in there :)

Last week I went to another midwife appointment and the good news is I'm up a few pounds, and am quite certain it's all in my boobs. I am like my very own Boobzilla. I jokingly tell people that this is awesome, seeing as I got my dad's boobs in the genetic roulette game. It's taking some getting used to, though. I have to pay more attention to the appropriateness of my shirts, have to get a bigger size, well, because I can't spend money on a medium anything without thinking I have to wear it out in the next few days before I won't be able to be comfortable in it. 

We've started looking at and thinking about baby furniture, and have decided that there's enough cribs and rockers and barely used clothes and toys out there that should get us started...plus we're both handy with sanders and paintbrushes to make it all look trendy enough.

4 years :)

Just taking a moment to appreciate the way the last 5 years has totally rocked my world:

2005 Engagement Trip to Alaska

2006 Wedding

2007 First Anniversary in Connecticut

2008 Fixing up the new house

2009 in Breckenridge, Colorado

2010 East Coast of Oahu

Happy 4 Years, Love! I'm excited to be diving into this next adventure with you by my side.

Epiphany.

I was tie-dyeing some orange onesies for my friend and decided to throw a couple in there of the newborn variety for myself. It wasn't until I pulled them out of the dye and finished undoing the rubber bands on the first one for baby Stock that I swear I heard a firecracker go off in my head all glowing and sparkly like that said HOLY CRAP OUR BABY'S GOING TO WEAR THIS!

And then I started grinning and got really, REALLY excited :)

Growing Pains and Beauty Secrets

We all know about the crazy transformation a uterus goes through when it's housing a developing baby...LOTS of stretching and growing, which in theory is a magical thing. In practice? It's a little uncomfortable. Not in a bad way really, but in a I-just-spent-the-afternoon-at-Salt-Lick kind of way.

I know that stretch marks are a genetic inevitability for me, but that hasn't stopped me from getting some of the Mama Bee products that Burt's Bees put out - I picked up their peppermint leg and foot cream, body oil, and belly balm. I tried out the leg cream this morning after my shower and the tingly peppermint felt sooooooo good, because usually in the summer I am a furnace anyway and now I have this whole other circulatory system going on in my body so I'm ROASTING kind of all the time, so with the fan on and the tingly lotion...it was awesome. 

I have been a LUSH fanatic since before it came to the US, and when my sweet sister came into town last summer we discovered our mutual love and she shared her secret to beautiful skin which I have since adopted:

Burt's Bees Body Oil + LUSH Buffy Bar. Start at your feet and apply some oil then go to town with the buff bar, working your way up your body, scrubbing in circular motions. Rinse. 

I do this about 1-2 times/week.

Finally, every night right before going to bed I bust out the belly balm. Like I said, there's nothing to be done about stretch marks except nourish your skin, drink lots of water and love on it while marveling about the amazing stuff it can do (like make room for a whole other PERSON!). The massage also helps the oh-so-slow digestion (according to a massage therapist I talked to, you're supposed to top right to top left, down, and then from left to right).

Definitely enjoying this pregnancy thing a whole lot more these days :)

Thankful.

You know what? Thank GOD for the second trimester. If I felt the way I felt a couple weeks ago? We'd be having the one kid. In fact, the women I've spoken to who have thrown up "all day every day" for 9 months (their words) have a total of 1 child. I totally get that.

We got a juicer this weekend, which has coincided with me being JUST SO FREAKING EXHAUSTED and I think it's because the babe is wicked excited to be getting lots of delish nutrients and is busy growing and therefore wearing me out.  The latest concoctions have included variations on the theme of spinach/cucumber/apple/pineapple/strawberries/fresh blackberries/oranges/lemons.

In other words, there's a party in my tummy.

I threw up on my laundry today.

Hey, strangers.

I've felt a little disconnected from my whole enjoying-the-pregnancy thing because I've been trying to get my head around work and every wonderful and sometimes really difficult learning experience, so I decided to get back to my love of journaling. I have a brain drain that I try to write a couple pages in every night to empty everything out so that it doesn't keep me up at night. Working like a charm. Handwritten journaling is so my anti-drug.

I am feeling tons better, thankfully. More the mental aspect than anything, because sometimes I get queasy, and every weekday, without fail, I puke. Sometimes once, sometimes twice, always stomach acid. I've gotten to the point that I kind of look forward to it because I feel really, really good afterward. But today, I decided that maybe I should put some clothes in the wash before going to work. So I bend over to put the clothes in the washer and before I could stop it, I puked a little on my clothes. That were about to go into the washer. So you know, no harm no foul.

I'm deliriously sleepy - I played really hard today, so I'm going to put myself in cozy cozy bed and I promise I'll be a better blogger soon :) It's inevitable: the next 4 weeks are about to be filled with George Lopez, Bob Schneider, Train, Asleep at the Wheel, Rhett Miller, and Imogen Heap.