Reflections on Camp...

I miss it - all of it. Despite the triple-digit heat we had for six days, I miss:

singing blessings before every meal

braiding hair

making daisy chains

painting rocks

busting kitchen raids

swimming every day

"top secret" excursions to stargaze, and that whole adventure being a bust due to mosquitoes and some unidentifiable screeching animal 

sitting quietly while a camper pours her heart, her fears, her angry out, and finding something to do about it.

does a body good

Seriously, if there's one thing I'm looking forward to getting pregnant sometime in the future, it's the excuse to get a massage at least once a month. I have a dear friend Scott who is an absolute MIRACLE WORKER in the massage department. Here's his website. If you're in the DFW area or just planning to visit soon, you should schedule an appointment with him.

I rolled my ankle two weeks ago while working in the garden, which has put a big, sad, damper on my triathlon training. I scheduled a one-hour session with him this morning at 9am, and was greeted with this sign:

Definitely something I needed to take to heart today. When I was checking in with my therapist before the massage, I complained of my ankle and then said, "I don't know if this is relevant information, but I feel like I've been holding on to a whole lot of negativity lately." Instead of looking at me like I was cuckoo, he said, "That can certainly exacerbate the issue." 

See why I go to this guy?

Anyhow, throughout the session, I had to keep reminding myself to BREATHE and let everything GO and just enjoy the moment.

I walked out of there with an incredible lightness of being and sense of balance. I am a huge advocate of self-care, and tend to over-tell people to check in with themselves and treat themselves, even if it's just figuring out where your happy place is and trying to focus on that place for just a solid minute every so often throughout the day, maybe even say a prayer of gratitude or asking for help, without taking the time to do such things myself.
I'm going to try this next week, though, to do just that. I'm going to be off on Saturday morning for a week of summer grief camp and I know that self-care for me will be of utmost importance. I see it as a vessel of water - the more I pour out, the more that I have to be sure to fill myself up with, whether it be crochet or photography, playing music or working in the garden.

You don't have to be a therapist to need this stuff in your day though - like I said, that solid one minute of checking in with yourself can totally change your day. Give it a try and let me know how it goes. I'll do it too.

It Ain't Good

Last weekend I hung out with some friends in New Braunfels, tubing and just generally relaxing. I was pleased to find out that there was a Bob Schneider show going on at Whitewater, and I was thrilled at the prospect of spending a lovely Texas evening under the stars with good music.

The venue did not disappoint - the stage's backdrop is the Guadalupe river, the grounds are beautifully landscaped with native Texas plants, and we were quite literally tucked in between some hills. Another plus to the place was that their food was reasonably priced. I got two tasty vegetarian (rice, black beans, veggies, pico) tacos for $5, and the drink prices were pretty much standard for a music venue. 

Since I turned 25 I realized that I've seen more Bob shows in the form of his solo act or with The SCABS than I have of any other musician. The SCABS were my first Austin show - it was my 15th birthday (we lied and said I was 16 just so I could get in to the venue), I know all his songs, even worked for his PA for a little bit once upon a time when I wanted to be a music business maven, yet I can't say that I'm a big fan of his. There really used to be nothing like a live SCABS or Bob Schneider show. I remember when they would all dress up in marching band uniforms or their sharp black suits, and miscellaneous undergarments would get thrown on the stage, and every show was new, exciting, different. About 5 or so years ago, the shows became canned - everything the same, every time, with the variety being only in "It Ain't Good" (where members of the band can improvise) or his encore song (and even then only sometimes).

I appreciate his music and the lyrics and the scathing cleverness behind a lot of what he does, but this show...I don't know. Maybe because I was exhausted from a big day of being on the river, but I think lackluster is a good word to describe it. I found myself wishing that the last Bob show I went to at Lakeway last summer was the last show of his I'd ever seen, because it was amazing, lighthearted, and a heck of a party (plus, free!). Candace even said that she felt like everyone else was in on something that we were totally missing. There were so many things about the show that turned us off (from the T-shirts, the whole FAYM concept, and the first four really low-energy songs) I described it to her as a whole new generation of college kids who thinks the sun shines out of his behind, and we just happen to know better, or have grown up. We now know way too much about him and how he treats people to like him as a person, but still have to admit that his songs are quality. He is indeed a talented songwriter, and from what I hear, an inspiration to many in the singer/songwriter world. If you listen to Bob's ramblings on his website, you can tell - something is different. Things just ain't what they used be.

At any rate, after 11 years of enjoying his music live, though I will probably still use his songs in my lyric analysis for music therapy, I don't need to see him live ever again.

#sigh

today, the morning I get rid of my ACL 3 day pass, of which all are sold out, I found out that the company trip has been...

...wait for it.

r

e

s

c

h

e

d

l

e

d

*update: I had a long chat with my cousin last night, he helped put things into perspective. I'm disappointed that everything worked out like this, but it's just a music festival, and I trust God has his reasons. It was just a kick in the ribs after a really awful day. BUT, today is already better :)

oops, Monday? again?

So, in lieu of a made-up interview or one whereas I interview myself (and have time to make up startlingly witty answers), I've decided to take a gamble - how 'bout you guys ask me questions, and I'll answer them.  Feel free to ask more than one.

Ready go.

From Daina: What is your favorite instrument?

This is a really tough call. I love learning how to play new instruments and am blessed that I have a good ear and learn really quickly on any instrument.  I always say that piano is my first love in that I started playing when I was about 3, and therefore the range of expression on it is just mind-blowing. In fact, it's probably where my ear training and talent is based. The piano is at the center of why I decided to become a music therapist - I leaned on my piano (sometimes quite literally) when I was going through my mom's illness or my parents' divorce, all those things. My mom even said when I moved off to college she was most going to miss my 3am "recitals." I just love playing whatever instruments I can get my hands on. The trick is picking them up on a regular basis to get fluent with each.

From Daina: What is your favorite thing about music therapy?
This is really, really kind of tough for me to answer, but the first thought that came to mind is that music therapists work with all populations from mothers who are giving birth to hospice patients who wish to have the aid of music as they take their leave from life, and everything in between.

There's job security, especially when you work with the mental health populations.

Last week I was reminded of another favorite thing about music therapy - that the inherent things about music: the rhythm, the fun, its improvisational quality, are all things that change the lives of people every day. Where once there was an old lady sitting, screaming obscenities at someone, she is now playing drums, singing, reminiscing, dancing. Where once there was a child scared of everyone who came into their hospital room is now someone smiling, playing drums, creating songs.

I guess overall I'm just thankful that I get to use my favorite thing in the world to change peoples' lives, and that in turn changes and blesses me.

Yum, Drugs.

I've always been a proponent of remedying what ails my body in the most natural way possible. It was, after all, local honey that saved my poor bronchials from defeat several times while growing up in South Texas aka The Cedar Capital of the World (turns out I'm allergic to all things Juniper, something I learned during my senior Biology of Plants class in college). I even snuggle up close with my Neti-Pot when the weather turns to wheezing and general feelings of death-by-mucus.

However, I recently did some investigative work into my bloodwork history and discovered that my thyroid stimulating hormone levels have been teetering on the edge of screwy. "AHA!" I thought. I knew all the symptoms 'cos all the ladies in my family are plagued with various twists of thyroid tumult, including cancer and a fun little thing called Hashimoto's. In fact, at a bridal shower, I distinctly recall not only that the cake was super tasty but that every woman in my family sat around the table discussing what dosage of Synthroid they were on.  Kinda spooky.

So, I finally hauled my hair-falling-out, family-history-of-thyroid-issues, mildly depressed, foggy-brained, sleepy-from-the-time-I-wake-up-'til-I'm-asleep-again, can't-lose-weight-even-though-training/racing-triathlons-and-eating-really-healthy, to the doc, armed with bloodwork results and I'm glad to report that I've been on Synthroid for four days. You can say what you want about placebo effect, but oooh I feel the stormcloud lifting from my head. It started small, tiny rays of sunshine peeking through. It's almost overwhelming, the amount of energy I have throughout the day. I found myself wondering if they'd prescribed some kind of street-drug upper for me. Nope, just getting ye 'ole thyroid tweaked. I had even lost 5lbs as of this morning, and that's with some beers with dinner, ice cream from Sonic, and not working out as I twisted my ankle working in the garden last weekend.

Added bonus: the pills for the next two weeks are not only chewable but kinda citrusy. Nom.

Whew. I feel like I'm back, after who knows how long of not being so. Eesh. Good to be back.

Sweaty & Dirty in the Garden

I know, I know, it was 100+F this past weekend. However, the hubs had plans other than sitting around eating ice cream in the air conditioning. We quite literally worked outside all day, both days. Since resolving to get chickens, we've started a list of things we need to do, including getting a coop built, but also remedying the issue of the shady part of the garden where nothing ever grows. Here's what we did, in pictures: 

K is far more of a morning person than I am and when I woke up on Saturday morning, he'd gotten most of the trench for the brick wall dug out. I'm glad in our relationship we've got a good balance of detail oriented and, um, the complete opposite, especially during this project. I learned a lot about building garden walls, including the importance of paver base, and how incomplete our lives were without an 8x8 tamper. No end of jokes there, my favorite being Kyle's while resuming work: "You ready to get your tamp - on?"

We've got the brick part done (I'll take some more pictures tomorrow), and I've bought a tiller to break up the beautiful, sticky clay that plagues Richardson.

Next step: Soil amending!

Josh Rosenthal Interview

I recently had the super cool opportunity to interview a musician named Josh Rosenthal. He's the husband of my friend Becky,  who I met on a Campus Crusade summer project in Spain. If y'all know anything about me, you know that I'm a die-hard for live music and supporting up-and-coming musicians, so when Becky approached me about doing the interview I was so excited! She sent me three of his CDs and they spent a week in my car on repeat. What I found was a refreshing depth of character that made me think and some really good guitar playing. You can get his music on iTunes, and from his website. In fact, before reading the interview, you should go dip your toes in at his MySpace page.

So here you go, the very first Monday's Mellifluous Music interview:

What in the world made you want to become a musician in the first place?

I either wanted to be a doctor, pastor or musician.  Oddly enough I found the things I desired in medicine and ministry to come together as one in music.  I can write songs and use them as instruments of healing in the lives of the people I love.

I met Becky on a Campus Crusade trip to Spain when we were in college and next thing I heard, she was marrying you! I enjoyed the songs on your CDs that were obviously about your relationship because they were honest. What’s y’alls story?

We dated for three months before getting engaged.  But we knew of each other for years.  We went to junior high and high school together but never noticed.  She was the hot popular girl who drove a Jeep Wrangler and I was the punk kid who drove 1984 Mercury.  We didn’t really run in the same circles.  Once we were both home for the holidays.  It was love at 3,872^nd sight.  We don’t notice each other until exactly the right time and we got married within the year.

You’re right.  A lot of my songs start from Becky and me.  We’ve got a great marriage, but we work hard at it.  We want to use our mistakes to teach other people what to avoid if at all possible.

A family member once described his songwriting process as “someone turning a radio on in his head.” How does your songwriting process go?

It’s funny; it really has little to do with music.  My greatest inspiration comes from, but isn’t limited to, things like Grey’s Anatomy.  Its writers are geniuses.  Their story lines are so specific yet so universal.  That’s what I want to do with my songs.  If a circumstance in life strikes me and makes me feel a strong emotion, I try to capture it in a song.  If music didn’t move me the way it does, I’d be content in any profession that provides people cathartic outlets for healing.

On a scale of 1-100, how much do you like playing live shows? What’s your favorite and least favorite part?

100.  Some guys I know love the studio and play shows out of necessity.  I’m the opposite.  I’m intrigued by moments.  So far I’ve only been able to capture so much in the studio.  But at a concert you can create a moment with a song that moves people.  There is something special about a live show that allows for emotional moments. 

My least favorite part?  Setting up gear and tearing it down.

How do you think your style has evolved since you started recording? What have been your biggest influences in this?

One listen to each album shows a pretty major evolution in the sound. But, more than anything, my style has changed because I know what I want to say. Every artist has to have a message. Early on, for me, it was “hey, listen to me.” Now it has more to do with truly singing meaningful things to people. I try to tap into those universal pains and bring hope to them.

Where do you want to be personally and professionally in the next 5 years?

I hope to have strong followings outside the Rocky Mountain region. I’d like to double the amount of albums I sell every year. If a label opportunity comes along, I’ll explore it, but it will not be a barometer of my success.

Because I’m also from a small town and can totally relate to “Gotta Get Out” I was wondering, how do you think coming from a small town has shaped your worldview?

Great question. Yes, I give Lubbock a hard time in the same manner I give Ben Robie a hard time. Jokes at his expense are entertaining but ultimately I love the guy. I owe my ability to hold meaningful conversations to my Lubbock upbringing. I used to joke that people from larger towns have more to entertain them.  In Lubbock, all we had was conversations. We sit in a room and talk for hours on end. That would be our evening activity. To answer your question, it shaped my worldview by helping value conversations with people.

Why Utah?

Google it and look at the pictures.

On the back of Renaissance, there’s a peek of a tattoo on the inside of your right arm. What is it and what does it signify?

It says “ALIVE”. My friend Asher and I got tattoos together in Coeur d’Alene, Idaho. The whole time I got mine, he was singing Pearl Jam’s song by the same name. A lot of people survive or barely get by, but how many people are truly alive? I want to be fully alive.

How would you classify your music genre-wise and how do you set yourself apart from other “boys-and-their-guitars”?

I’m Americana/Folk. Those who subscribe to he “boys and their guitars” image don’t have long careers. They may get popular, but they burn out quickly. The longest lasting careers are usually tied to the meaningful message of the artist. Any popular song in my genre has lyrics that resonate with people. I like to think the marriage of my message and my live show set me apart from the average singer/songwriter.

What was your inspiration for “Bless the Fire”?

I complain a lot when life is difficult. Once the difficulty passes and I’m stronger for it, I speak highly of life’s challenges. Bless the Fire was my attempt at loving a really challenging situation while in the middle of it. It’s easy to look back and say hard times are good. But it’s another to say they’re good if you’re living through the death of a loved one or something equally as tragic. I want to joyfully accept what life gives me when it gives it to me.

I think you’ve got a lot going for you in the talented and inspired department and am excited for whatever you’re going to put out next. What do you have coming up next for you musically?

Thanks. I’m releasing four new albums this year – August 18, September 15, October 13 and November 27. I’ll be doing a lot of traveling in the fall to support their releases.

Jakers

This is what happens the day after you take your dog for a run in the morning, to daycare all day, and let him play with his girlfriend (the Hower's dog, Nutmeg) all night:

Speaking of pets, I know we've been talking a lot about getting a second dog, but...um...we really want chickens. K has found a really cute design for a chicken coop, and with the plans we have to start in on some sweet flowerbeds in the back yard and the recent research I've done regarding the awesomely nitrogenous-ness of chicken poo and how good it is for plants, well...we're getting chickens first.

Luckily, our local nursery is quite progressive and is not only hosting chicken how-tos AND a local farmer who raises chickens for just such purposes, so we're kind of excited. The next month we'll be putting in some new flower beds and constructing the coop, the earliest we'd be getting chickens will be around August 9th (coincidentally the same time they'll be showing "Mad City Chickens" at NHG).

We've decided to start with 3 chickens that lay brown eggs and then once we get the hang of things, we'll add an Americana/Auracana chicken. Why? Well, because this kind of chicken lays green and blue eggs, of course!

Dang...

So, I definitely got 3-day ACL tickets a few months back, and have been looking forward to it ever since. Last night, I found out that my hubs' company trip in Dallas (staying at a swank hotel) is going to be that exact same weekend. At first blanch I have no clue what to do. Ideas, anyone? What would you do?

How does my garden grow? Haphazardly.

One of the good memories I have of my dad from growing up was our annual attempts at tomato and cucumber farming. If I couldn't grow anything else, I knew I could grow tomatoes. In fact, one recent father's day, I gave him a huge palette of tomatoes I had grown from seed on the back porch of our (former) apartment, because I had started them from seed, not thinking all the seeds would take, and ending up with like, 50 little seedlings.

This year, I decided to veer from the cherry tomato variety and try my hand at some big momma beefsteaks. Of course, I get them planted and then 3 weeks later my sweet elderly neighbor who's been here forever informed me that they wouldn't fruit 'cos it gets too hot here.

I held up hope for months though, marveling at how quickly they grew from 1' to 5' in a matter of weeks, carefully perusing the internet for tips on pruning and staking, dutifully fertilizing with Garrett Juice.

A couple weeks ago, we witnessed the (ahem) fruits of our labors, so to speak...Sadly, though, the neighbor was correct. Although there are loads of blooms on my plants, they are dropping off like crazy. 

Luckily, a local gal from North Haven Gardensblogs and just this morning guided me on what to do next...looks like the tomato plant on the right is headed for the compost pile. You can't really tell from the photo, but there are pepper plants in there that are probably aching for some face time with the sun. The plant with fruit on it we're going to keep until the four tomatoes we have ripen.

This year has been a really big education for me in gardening. I told K at the beginning that I wanted to take a "more haphazard" approach to my garden, to which he replied, "MORE haphazard? How is that even possible?" I have to say that it's been a really magical way to garden...I was pleasantly surprised when even though I planted my pretty little violas and they immediately fried in the sun, they reappeared several weeks later about 1-2 feet from where they had originally been planted. Then yesterday, upon returning home from a wedding in Houston, I saw this pretty little surprise tucked up in next to my germander! I don't know what it is or how it got there, but it's little things like that (and the two frogs who have taken up residence in various pots and plants) that keep me gardening and realize the importance of going with nature's flow.

mobile update!

I am blogging from my hubs's phone so this won't be too lengthy as posting is kinda arduous with just using one's thumbs. I had an interesting week - it ended in a score of Autistic Kids: 3, Christina: 0. I don't know what it is but every time I go to assess an autistic chikd, there is usually screaming involved. I know I still have much to learn about this population, but it gets discouraging real quick. In other news. Kids with CP and DS love me.

ugh.

"Ours is a Family Run by Women"

The title quote came from my cousin recently while we were in San Antonio celebrating my grandmother's 88th birthday (or, grandmapalooza, as it was officially christened). It is QUITE rare that we all get together, even for Thanksgiving or Christmas, because I have one fabulous sister who lives in LA (who if you've not met by now, you need to) and a cousin who is generally galavanting around the world.

Even more rare are moments when the women in our family get together to laugh and tell stories. I was struck one morning when we gathered in my grandmother's enclosed patio: the glorious matriarch and all her ladies - my mother, my step-aunt, my sisters, my niece, and me. We truly are a family of mostly women...my grandfather passed away nearly 10 years ago, leaving my uncle, my step-uncle, my brother and my cousin. But oh, what a lush, eclectic, glamorous bunch of women I have as role models!

It's funny, then, that I am also doing Beth Moore's "Esther" Bible study and the very first week was all about the fact that "it's tough being a woman in another woman's shadow." This of course made me think about all the wonderful women in my life who have influenced me in one way or another. I know that I am now myself emerging from the shadows of influence - not that they were necessarily oppressive in any way, but as the youngest for a very, very long time, one can find herself struggling to find her own independence in a family of influential women.

So anyway, I've been thinking about this a lot over the last few weeks as I have slowly started realizing my own strengths and deep passions, that have all been crafted over the course of my life and led me to who I am. This has all been a product of finishing graduate school and suddenly hitting the wall of WHAT'S NEXT!? and being generally floundery in any sort of decision forward. But this morning, the last line of week 1's study was this: "it's tough being a woman in another's shadow, but sometimes, there in the hiddenness, God builds a woman she'd never otherwise become."

Huh.

Happy 3rd Anniversary!

Okay, so we have been married 3 years but have pretty much been together(ish, depending on how you calculate time spent together, then apart, then together ;) for 8. Right? Let's see. We went to a movie in Spring '02, spent the summer Emailing madly, and went on our first date that fall. Shakespeare in Zilker Park. We'll just count that as the beginning. So then, about 7ish.

Every once in awhile I pull out this book that Kyle made for me one Christmas that has all the Emails we've ever sent to each other. What I like about it is that it's a true chronicle of the bumpy road we went down to find, then lose, then find each other again. See, 'cos when I met Kyle I thought he was cute and all, and then we started dating and he downright scared me. I didn't have to prove anything, do anything, be anything other than myself and he loved me. Even a couple times when I ran helter-skelter and put up all these roadblocks to my heart, he was right there. Loving me. Unconditionally.

It was a long time before I could come to terms with that, and actually like the fact that I had truly found the most steadfast, faithful, Godly, hilarious, and way into me guy in the whole world.

Here, let me get you a barf bag.

I seriously am blown out of the water by the brains, the creativity, and the love my husband shows every day. And he's SUPER HOT to boot, so...yeah. Lucky me :)

And then four years later...

Reading Nook

I sent my husband's frustration with my flights of fancy quite nearly into the upper limits yesterday when he came home and saw that I had been, um, playing in the dirt all day. By the way, if you're stopping in from the germinatrix, welcome! Stay awhile!

What you're seeing is the beginnings of what I like to refer to as the "reading nook." On the East side of our house we have a long stretch of shady nothingness where pretty much nothing grows and nothing gets done except Jake running the fence and the composting. So, naturally, I want to overhaul it. This past weekend while spending quality face-to-face time with my sweet sister I pitched the idea to her and we came up with ideas and she threw all kinds of plant names at me to find and plant.

The basic idea is this: I want to have a space where someone can go to sit, relax, have a glass of tea, and read or listen to music. I'm a therapist, and I want a happy place. I have this idea in my head that I really really want to come to fruition, so yesterday I pulled out the gardening tools and went to town. There's a LOT of dirt to be moved, people. I'm planning to paint the fence a funky shade, probably a soothing blue-ish green or maybe even a lively reddish orange. It's going to be covered over in passion flower vines. There will be a long walkway that will open up into the nook, which will have a deck and be a little reminiscent of Casa De Luz in Austin.

I'll post pictures as I slog through this mess - there's a bunch of bamboo and did I mention a MOUNTAIN of dirt that needs to be moved around, but I'm really excited. The idea is to have the side of the house double as reading nook and built-in entertaining. So far I need to focus right now on the end of the path, but the rest will have a graded wall with all kinds of fun grasses, flowers, and low-growing groundcover like moss rose and moneywort.

So yeah, if you want to get a little sweaty and a little dirty, I need help in my garden! ;)

First Tri of the Season

I think Summer will be my favorite time of year forever, especially now that I've been bitten by the tri bug and there are tons of races each month! I have committed to two more: the Wurst Tri Ever in August, and the big mama Austin Tri in September.

This past Sunday was my sophomore experience at the Danskin Women's Triathlon and it was SUCH a different experience from the first. I was really annoying and kept saying "last year...." and comparing the races. First of all, we got there JUST as the transition area was closing, then had maybe 30 minutes 'til our respective waves took off and even then quite nearly missed them. This year I committed to partaking in some Clif Gu shots, which I have to say weren't all that bad. I had one before the swim and one during the bike, then I couldn't find my third between the bike and the run until AFTER the race. Burn on me.

The swim was SO difficult this time. I don't remember it being so hard to catch my breath - I expected the adrenaline rush at the beginning but even halfway through the swim I struggled to catch a deep breath. As much as I love swimming, I really didn't feel good about this swim. I felt different about a lot of parts of the race - like when I ran all the way (uphill, mind you) from the swim to the bike transition. That was when I was like "hey! I'm stronger!" and I thanked myself for those months of training even when I didn't want to. The bike - oh my. I only remember there being two really wicked hills on the course. My memory is completely jacked,  because the course is like a rollercoaster! The good news though was last year I walked two hills, but this time I walked NO hills. I also have about 50 more gears on this bike than I did on my old bike, and blasted down the hills as well as up them. The bike-to-run transition was killer again. My legs are just absolute jelly when I get off the bike. I have a plan to work on that over the next couple months - adding leg strengthening exercises, do some 5Ks, work bricks more diligently. 

So, here's my time & transition breakdowns:

Overall Rank: 1241 of 1976

Class Rank: 159 of 218

Swim: 00:22:46

Swim Rank: 596

Transition 1: 5:01

Bike: 00:49:32

Bike Rank: 975

MPH: 14.5

Transition 2: 3:33

Run: 00:46:09

Run Rank: 1664

Pace: 00:14:53

Final: 02:07:03

I'm surprised I did that well on the swim considering all the breathing problems I had. The breakdown clearly shows the areas I have to work on - the first transition, the bike, but especially the run. My goal for August is to shave some time off the bike time, but especially the run. I know that everything depends on the biking course, and knowing NB it'll be nothing like Austin, but still. I'm just really glad that I came in close to 2 hours - I wanted to beat last year's time of 2:30hrs and I did! Go me.

Afterward, I didn't feel nearly as spent as the last time...I mean, I was exhausted, but I didn't sleep for hours and hours. Instead, I went to Home Slice and Hey, Cupcake! with my cousin, then napped for about an hour, then dug into some barbecue. Yesterday I was overall pretty tired and moving slowly due to a sharp pain in the outside of my right foot but today I woke up at about 7am and am slowly working out the residual kinks. I think getting a massage immediately after the race also aided in my recovery.

SPEAKING of recovery, I've decided to put triathlon tips on here, just little notes of what I've learned along the way.

TRIATHLON LESSON #1: If you have clips, practice clipping out. A lot. This leads us directly to...

TRI LESSON #2: If you go biking two days before your tri, don't clip out on your right and then try to make a left turn in gravel.

So yeah! One down, two to go in this glorious season of tri, tri-ing again. Next up in August will be my very first co-ed race, and I am excited not only for that but also because it's going to be in fabulous NB!

Bloom Bloom Pow

So, in the front yard it looks like we're growing aliens. Aliens and blackberries which by the way I am in a constant race with the birds to see who can get to the ripe ones first. Right now the score is Christina: 2, Birds: 4. 

I took a gamble on some gorgeous looking Dahlias because I had never planted bulbs before and really didn't quite know what to do with them but hey they were on sale at Home Depot and I LOVE Dahlias. They were one of the main flowers in my bridal bouquet, including Chocolate Callas and Ranunculus. I love lush, interesting flowers, and am now starting to get excited about putting them into my garden and learning about what makes them grow.

The first photos are of flowers that have yet to bloom, and OH! the anticipation waiting for them to bloom!

And it is so worth the wait! Don't delay, get Dahlias in your yard next year!

Good Thing We're Training A Smart Dog

So, a few weeks ago I mentioned that we wouldn't be getting a puppy yet because we had to figure things out with Jake first. Well, after a couple visits to the Dallas Dog Trainer, Jake is doing GREAT! He's a very, very smart dog, and picks things up ridiculously fast. Especially if there's hot dogs involved. Apparently we had our roles of the pack all screwed up and have been working on who's in charge of who in the house. His behavior has improved dramatically. Anyone who needs help with their dogs, I suggest you go to the Dallas Dog Trainer because we learned a LOT about dog behavior that has changed the way we interact with Jake.

We've been working every day on heeling and walking and we've gotten to the point where I can drop his leash and sprint off ahead of him and he'll not only catch and keep up with me, he slows down when I slow down. 

So, this video is probably evidence that when we have kids, I'll be all ZOMG! HE/SHE BLINKED! and then blog all about it but I have to tell you that when we started working on this, Jake just looked at the shut door like "wtf?" and in 2 minutes, figured it out without my help.

Untitled from christina stock on Vimeo.

Triathlon Season

Next week is the Danskin Women's Triathlon and as of 5 minutes ago I am officially signed up :) I am doing two tris, possibly three this year. There's a tri in NB that I can't NOT do, it's right in my backyard!

I still suck at running, but I can bike and swim forever. My goal for next week is to run the entire 5K - last year I ran/walked. I'm super pumped :)

I am a biking fool.

No offense at all to my old bike. It got me through my first Danskin Women's Tri last year and we didn't even come in last! But, she was heavy and the wheels were a funky size, so I had a hard time finding and keeping tires and tubes for it. 

So, when graduation and me getting a job rolled around I figured I would get a new bike! Nothing fancy or carbon or anything, just a good bike on which I could both race and go to the grocery store.

So, I hit the Bike Mart website and lo and behold I found my little biker soulmate. I was so excited that first day that I got Azzi (short for Azucar) that I rode her 15.5 miles. Yeah. definitely paid for it later. 

Anyway, it's been about 3 days and I've already put more than 20 miles on it - I biked to go swimming yesterday (don't get me started on how much it makes me miss Austin and NB in the summertime) and then today I biked some errands. I'm getting more confident on busier streets, although sometimes I still hit the sidewalk when I'm not feeling confident enough in the drivers around me. 

It makes me wish that there were more fresh local markets in my 'hood. And rivers. But there's not too much I can do about that second one.

Turns out I just needed a little oomph to get my groove back. I'm stoked about the possibilities of having this bike, of the lower gasoline bill/emissions and adding a new element to my year of health!

*yawn*

verve [vurv] -noun:

1. enthusiasm or vigor; spirit.

2. vivaciousness; liveliness; animation

I currently have none of these. Perhaps it's because I'm coming down off the stressfulness of being in school and the brain-fuzz the allergy medicines cause.

Humbug.

I don't even know this girl...

but check out Maura's website, and please lift her and her family up in prayer. They need it today.

Camp El Tesoro

It's almost camp time! Check out the video here :o)

It'll be my third year and I'm soooo excited!

Barley?

Well...after many long hours of discussion and such, we decided to wait on getting a new puppy. Mostly because we've got a LOT of work to do with Jake...he's still sort of aggressive and still has a habit of nipping at children that we have to work on before adding another pooch to the mix. So, I'm calling the trainer today and signing Jake up for twice weekly training.  We'll let that go a couple weeks and then go from there.

I am definitely the spontaneous one and the hubs is not so much, so we've done a lot of talking and compromising on the arts of measured spontaneity and not over thinking things. It ultimately came down to being used to the whole "what's next?" mentality because that's how it's been for us as long as we've been together: I'll graduate and then move to Dallas and then he'll find a job in Dallas and move and then I'll go to school and then we'll get married and find an apartment and then there's this practicum or that new project or internship in Austin and then we have a new house and then graduation and then...and then....

We agreed that it was just time to take a breather and figure out what normal is for us now before adding another little bit of crazy into the mix.

GROSS!

Okay - this originally was going to be a cry for help. SOMETHING IS EATING MY PLANTS! More than frustrating, they're eating my tomato blooms! My lamb's ear! My sage! The horror! Here are some pics from the crime scene:

Now, in case you haven't noticed I've been a little preoccupied with such things as finishing my master's degree, and I've been a very bad Garden Mommy. But I'm back, and I'm ready to fight.

I've had some thoughts - maybe it's birds or worse, RATS snapping off my beautiful tomato flowers and dragging them off into the Great Beyond, so as a precautionary measure I encouraged my husband to pee on my plants. Hey, don't be ooged out, your grandparents did it. I also found out from the neighbor that rats are particularly bad around here and he's a sweet old wise man who has lived here awhile. No better place to get your gardening information.

I've had a sneaking suspicion that slugs were my nocturnal nemesis (nemeses?) because I saw their iridescent trails on the pavers a few weeks ago. 

Well, tonight the hubs and I were enjoying some Maredsous on the back porch after dinner and I thought "hey! My sweet sister over at thegerminatrix.com said that slugs were raging alcoholics..." so, I opened a less fancy beer and got out some plastic lids, poured about a half cm of beer in there and went inside. 

Folks, gratification has never been so swift. When the hubs went out 30 minutes later to let the dog out before bed, he exclaimed, "Dude, you are catching a sh*t ton of slugs with your beer." Thinking he was joking, I went outside and was giddy (and SUPER grossed out) at the sight of this:

Say it with me now: EEEEEWWWWWWWW!!!!

But much in the way that popping that pimple feels sooooo good, I'm glad to finally figure out what's going on. Folks, they were literally CRAWLING OUT OF THE LAMB'S EAR. Poor thing. I'll be sure and take pics of the dead slugs in the morning.

Aren't you excited.

Five Years Later...

Friday morning as I was getting ready for my defense and exam, I was stopped in my tracks by memories. I distinctly remember Mr. Richter's Business of Music class where I at once decided that a profession in the music industry was not my thing, and sometime during the semester wrote a paper and gave a presentation on music therapy. I found it the other day. It's terrible. I also remember actually giving the presentation, back when I was terrified of speaking in public.

More importantly, I remember telling my boyfriend Kyle about music therapy, and him saying "I think this would be a really good thing for you to do." See, because it was the Spring of my Junior year in college, and I was starting to freak out because I didn't know what I wanted to do with the rest of my life.

The original idea had actually been there all along. I was to go to music school first for performance, then med school. I had always been fascinated with how music effected the brain/body because of my own experiences using the piano as my own punching bag to deal with my mom being sick and my parents' divorce. I was actually a dual music/premed major for awhile. Then I took chemistry *shudder.* I think if I had the maturity and the drive I have now, I could have done it, but I just wasn't ready.

So, halfway through that paper/presentation I was doing, I got two really important phone calls. First from Kyle. "Did you know that the national conference for the American Music Therapy Association is in Austin this year?"

Huh? Tell me that isn't Providence.

The next call was one I had with my sister. "Hey, Merry Christmas, Happy Birthday, you're going to the conference." I didn't even know what that meant, but I was really grateful and really excited. At that point I even had to go against an organization I had just joined in order to attend the conference. The decisions I now had to make were dealing with the rest of my life, way past the scope of band sorority business, and it was a huge paradigm shift for me. It no longer mattered that that was the beginning of the end of some friendships, that people would probably think I was crazy for changing my concentration to ethnomusicology when I originally HATED music history. I had finally FINALLY found my niche. Besides that, I had learned that I was fascinated by world music history, and filled my schedule with as many ethno classes as I could get my hands on. My mediocre grades also drastically improved over those last three semesters. What a difference finding my way made.

I cannot even tell you the...sigh of relief, the overwhelming, giddy sense of peace that I got when I walked through the doors of that conference. There was a band singing praise songs and so many presentations on music's effect on everything from Autism to learning and memory in the brain that I often found myself going to two presentations during the same hour. I was enchanted. Also super enchanting was the spreadsheet that Kyle made for me. I still have it. It's an exhaustive list of every music therapy school in the country, their audition requirements, tuition and fees, and length of music therapy equivalency programs. I think that was actually one of the first times that I thought, "I am going to marry this guy."

So yeah, all that came rushing back as I drove to Denton and set up my computer, prepared my notes, and started answering questions about my thesis and the last four years of my education.

The choice to become a therapist is not an easy one. It means developing a sense of self that others are often allowed to ignore. One has to constantly be in check with oneself...am I getting enough sleep? Am I responding therapeutically to every situation? Is there a reason there could be some kind of counter-transference here? Sometimes I feel like I am a pitcher and if I'm not careful I will pour too much of myself out and have nothing left. I'm not saying any of that like "Oh I'm so self-aware it's amazing." I actually describe myself as painfully self-aware because I tend to really overdo it.

I think all that said it really means that graduate school, especially as means for a therapy ends (any kind, OT/PT/Neuropsych) is a meat grinder. A fun one without any real homework. One with mirrors in a fun house that constantly reflect you back to yourself and then asks, "what are you going to do with this? how are you going to help others with the gifts you've been given?"

The whole process on Friday was nerve wracking. I didn't sleep soundly for three days, couldn't eat the day before, and had to pull out all my reinforcements including my power panties, the clinical strength antipersperant/deoderant and even yes, the belting and tucking in of a button-down shirt. The thesis defense was actually a breeze. Relatively speaking, I guess. The rest of it was really cool and tough at the same time - the whole purpose of a defense/exam is to make sure you have the vocabulary to hold your own as a Master of Arts in Music and also as a music therapist with a higher than entry level degree. So, we basically just had a big conversation on topics from score analysis to Debussy (why does my life always come back to Debussy? That's a whole other blog post.) and Ravel, symbolism, impressionism, exoticism, behavioral and cognitive behavioral techniques in the psychiatric setting...everything.

Apparently I held my own.

By the way, after a national and regional presentation, I am no longer terrified of speaking in public. I have learned to play the guitar, to improvise (sort of), to conduct research, to do what I've always wanted to do: use music and help people.

omg done.

I have something more poignant to say, I promise, but that is going to have to wait 'cos I haven't really slept in 3 days and when I got home I was like yep. shower, then nap.

This is so surreal...it's like...okay...now what? I mean, I know now what - I do assessments next week and get rolling on the best career of my life but it's still kind of...wow.

and counting...

For your listening/learning pleasure

It's Almost Here...

Friday, May 8th I'll be doing my thesis defense and oral exam to complete my master's degree in music therapy. Here's an idea of what's going to take place so you can understand the sheer panic in my voice if you make the mistake of calling me in the next 10 days:

Section 1 - thesis

45 minutes of a formal presentation of my thesis. Just learned that today - I have to do a powerpoint presentation. 

Committee Makes Recommendations, Christina hastily jots them down.

Section 2 - oral exam

45 minutes of reviewing everything I've ever learned ever in:

Music History

Music Theory

Music Therapy

Bibliography (or, how to use a library)

The music theory & history stuff is all rolled up into a nice little ball of Armageddon where I will be "asked to identify scores of music - period (out of Baroque, Classical, and Romantic), possible composer, compositional techniques and style characteristics appropriate to that period...should be able to look at the music and tell which musical style period it belongs to and name a possible composer from that period along with other composers who used this style. Study the style characteristics from each of the major periods again in all the major areas - harmony, texture, instrumentation, dynamics, tonality vs. atonality or multitonality, compositional techniques, forms, etc."

That comes straight from my study guide and yes it continues but it makes me queasy to think about. The other sections will be a breeze. I'm just nervous about that first part.

Okay, gotta get back to studying. See you on the 9th!

ACL FEST!

So, the lineup is out today and LOTS of people are complaining that the big acts aren't big enough but the smaller acts are good blah blah blah. Newsflash people: if you want to go to Lolla or Bonnaroo or Coachella, you'll be paying at least $100 more, and yes, the acts will be bigger. For what Austin is offering, I think it's a good deal. Also, let's not forget where it started, in 2002, when the lineup included tons and tons of local acts like Bob Schneider, Grupo Fantasma, South Austin Jug Band, Patty Griffin, and Ryan Adams.

Ah, 2002. The first year of the festival, my cousin invited me to be his date, but I couldn't go because of a Symphony Band "tour" in Houston. I haven't ever had the funds to go, and am therefore excited beyond belief about this year. Wish Carlos was going to be there though.

frustrated!

I have since last week been trying to schedule my thesis committee meeting, hoping that I could do it either at the end of next week or the week after. It's Monday and the committee hasn't yet agreed on a date and when I try to be clear with one member, things get all jacked up. ARGH. The good news is that my thesis is now OUT of my hands Hallelujah and Amen and all I have to do is now study study study. 

I can't wait for this to be over.

I'm not saying I'm going totally vegan...

*I was going to post this as a comment to a friend's blog but it got too long. The gist of it was that her daughter won't drink milk. So here you go, Kel :) *

So, I read a book called The China Study, and it talks a LOT about how the protein in milk, casein (and lots of animal products) is implicated by the way of lots of scientific studies in childhood diabetes, autoimmune disease, cancer, high blood pressure, lots of stuff. I don't want to start a riot or anything, so anyone who's curious is going to have to check out the book, but I would like to have some conversation about it if anyone has read it, is vegetarian, or vegan...I'm always interested as to why people make the switch.

Because there are lots of compelling scientific studies and reports...like how the highest milk consuming societies also have the highest instance of osteoperosis and hip fractures...I have since tossed our milk (to the dismay of my hubs, who woke to make cereal and had no milk...oops) and have started playing with milk alternatives like almond and hemp...I just bought the hemp chocolate milk and it's super delicious and has lots of good Omega-3 and Omega-6.

The question that plagues me is what I'll do when I have children. I've never really understood the concept of drinking another animal's milk. In nature, no other animal does it, and in lots of Eastern cuisine, no milk is used. You don't order Pho with cheese, right?

So then what about the calcium bonanza we are inundated with? The whole Got Milk? campaign and such? What about calcium and bone strength? Where the heck am I going to get it? Well, as mentioned above, studies I've read point to milk & milk products being a detriment in bone health (I know, it sounds sooo weird) and that human bodies tend to react negatively to it. I know I was allergic when I was a kid, so what's to say that even though I'm not outwardly intolerant like, I don't break out in hives, that my intestines aren't hating me? Part of me thinks about Fast Food Nation and my experiences with my mom battling tobacco companies, because I tend to not trust the dairy council when they're putting so much money into marketing. Of course they're going to say that milk is good for you. Just like the orange growers saying there's sooooo much vitamin C in orange juice. Well, there is, but you don't hear as much about how much more vitamin C is in bell peppers.

Good news though! You get a lot of calcium in leafy green veggies - I googled "calcium in vegetables" and found this site, and look at all the delicious veggies! Broccoli! Kale! OKRA!

Like I said, I'm just going off of what I've read in a couple books and studies, and I'm still trying to figure it out, and I don't want to be some crazy activist, especially if I don't have the information to back it up. Any thoughts out there?

Hooray!

I think I've found a magazine to fill the Domino-mag-shaped hole in my heart: Do It Yourself Magazine! I LOVED Domino, but this mag is the one thing that I wanted more of in D. 

It's April 20th. Makes me think of this song:

Sneak Peak...

I'm working on a couple hand painted children's tables for a garage sale...

This is the before shot...

The blue table I think will have an underwater theme:

Not sure for the red yet. Both will be alphabet tables.

If I Were A Flower...

I'm pretty sure I'd be an Impatiens, because my picture is NOWHERE near the word "patient" in the dictionary.

I couldn't stand that my garden was bare while North Texas endured flip-floppy weather, and suddenly I found myself yet again at North Haven, picking out glorious herbs and a couple tomatoes. Because of the sunlight situation in the back garden, I've decided to focus my efforts back there on having a rock n roll kitchen herb garden, maybe some lettuces in the spring and fall. I feel like I'm even pushing it with two tomato plants in the sunniest spaces. 

My darling husband has pointed out that there is a huge sunny spot behind our garage that could be cultivated and used for some veggies. I've just got to get a handle on the herb garden first. I'm toying with the idea of just letting it go, letting the herbs go to seed, having things go a little crazy, see what happens. 

Last month I guess I planted a bunch of Nasturium and some Vioala's because I thought that the sunlight situation in the garden would be the same in the spring as it is in the fall.  Oh of course not.  But, one of my Nasturium made it and even flowered! The Violas were quite literally toast in a few short weeks. This Nasty seemed to have found the optimal mix of sun and shade. It's still doing lovely, and is now neighbors with some Lamb's Ear.

and SPEAKING of gardening, a HUGE shout out to my sweet cousin/sister The Germinatrix , seen here on the Bonnie Hunt Show recently (search for Ivette Soler). She's the proud owner of a wonderful gardening blog/community and you should totally check her out.

where my first paycheck is going...

Austin City Limits Music Festival

I can has jobs now?

Okay, I promised to write about the conference, but this past Thursday I met with my employer/supervisor and she BAM handed over like 13 referrals! I am so excited - I have about a month to get all my thesis junk finished, and then I'm off and running. Well, sort of - I actually have an assessment that needs to be done this week. It is so very refreshing to hear "I am so excited about music therapy! My son/daughter loves guitar/piano/percussion and I think it'll really help them out of their shell."

I think I wrote about this before but a friend asked what I would do if I wasn't doing music therapy. 

I mean, there are a lot of things I could do...I'm interested and pretty good at a lot of things...I could be a chef or photographer or stay at home momma or...ha, I just noticed that none of those really ally with the "conventional" way of thinking about jobs. I hope that I can be the same parent to my kid that my parents were to me in that they really gave me the best parts of them, and that ultimately led to me pursuing my dream, to use music and help people. From my mom I learned to accept people as they are, no matter what. Seriously, friends, she called me one night and was all, "I had dinner with someone who maybe I think you would know? Neville? I think? Was his last name? He was such a nice man..." Seriously. Rich or poor, famous or no, everyone has an equal footing.  We have an amazing family. Maybe I'll start writing about them more.  From my dad I got this crazy obstinate nature...my advisor even noticed it lately when I was having a conversation with her about the government doing a half-assed job with our education system. My idea is that if they're going to be in charge, then do it well. Tell the schools, "Second language learning? This is how everyone is going to do it." and then FUND the crap out of it, and if it doesn't work, then they'll tell you what to do. But don't just say you're in charge and then suck at it. Her response was, "That's really surprising coming from you. You don't let anyone tell you what to do." 

I'm going to pretend she means that as a compliment.

I'm also smiling, thinking of what my grandpa's face looks like up in Heaven, upon hearing that.

:) Anyway, I digress.

I couldn't do what Kyle does...too many things to remember. I could do a lot of things, but this...THIS is what my heart finds joy in. Part of the reason I am so looking forward to starting work is not that I finally get to indulge my shoe fetish but that in speaking with one mother of an individual with special needs, I get to go into their house and change lives with music! She spoke of a time that she played piano duets with her son and now he struggles with attention because he's deteriorated. 

Can you imagine? The possibilities that music therapy has to offer.

It is almost an overwhelming responsibility.

glorious tailspin

Dear Life/God,

Hey there, things are going great here, and you're certainly keeping me busy. Between finishing my thesis, starting my new job, presenting at the Creative Arts & Research Symposium that I have to make my poster for, and writing two articles for two newsletters, wow. I thought maybe once I was done with school my life would slow down, but it doesn't look like it will. That's okay, I kind of like it like this :) Thanks for the music therapy advocacy curveball - I just got into it and now my boss is all "hey let's do some advocacy stuff"...when things are coming from more than one source, I don't call that coincidence, I call that a not so subtle shove in the right direction.

Love,

Christina